There is no spoon

"After this, there is no turning back. You take the blue pill, the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill, you stay in Wonderland, and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes. Remember: all I'm offering is the truth. Nothing more." 

~ Morpheus (The Matrix - Larry and Andy Wachowski, 1999)

My first 'real' blog post. Gulp.

Training wheels off.

~ Check.

Shitting. My. Pants.

~ No, but as close as I want to get. So, umm yeah, check.

I've been known to be rather uh, "wordy" on my beginner/sexsite/wanna-be blog. Some posts turn out to be mini-novels. I love the fact that I can use youtube video's here to help me get my point across. (I do have a point....sometimes) The irony is, you'd think it would be the other way around.   Because you know, who fucking knew perv's could read?

Anyway, try to stay with me here. Just through this one little post...videos and all.  If it isn't for you....well then, whatever.

Of course as always, shit doesn't work out like I plan and I can't 'embed' the only video in the world that would possibly work.  So help me out and click the link  .......just do it.  (I am SOOO f'n stoked I can put a real LINK in my blog!!! Omg...YAY!! And it's even free!?! Who knew?!?)


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3VFDIKgm_QI&feature=player_detailpage

What am I trying to say with that?  That I am Morpheus and know everything, including some super-secret really cool shit?  Or that if you hang out here, I  promise to give you some really bad ass drugs so this shit makes sense?  Or that someday we will fornicate like rabbits and walk hand in hand in a winter wonderland?

Umm negatory scooter.  None of the above.  (probably) 

What I will tell you is........the truth.  That is all.  Nothing more, nothing less.-- Ok, well sometimes maybe MORE.  But most of the time, not less.--  Granted it will be the truth as I see it and I can't promise my vision won't be sometimes skewed by the ba (pronounced bee-ay...short for bad-ass.  Yes I have teenagers) drugs I may or may not have.... that I may or may not be taking....that I am not sharing with you either way. (probably)

This truth will rarely be poetic, gramatically correct, philosophical in nature, remotely positive or life altering in any fucking way...... what-so-ever..... so help me gawd....or something.  I may sometimes say it in an offensive, crass, crude, vulgar (Ok it will probably always be vulgar....fuck is totally my favorite word and I would not be able to speak without it) way.  But never in an intentionally mean spirited, hateful, I know everything and you are retarded kind of way. (probably)

I want to conclude this welcome with a video that in addition to my directness and honesty, is much like what I hope you will be able to expect from this blog.  Slightly off, dark in places, ass backwards at times (they don't even get the colors right!! WTF??) But still pretty damn funny....
Enjoy,
Subs